I realize Mr. Hart's articles are largely satirical, so I'm not "on" him for mentioning this common opinion or perception. I just have a problem with the the absolute of "NO" being applied to these occupations. For the benefit of non-American readers, it should be noted that Mr. Hart lives in the only state, of the gun-crazed United States, where it is legal for an ordinary citizen to carry a loaded, holstered firearm in an open, public place.

Despite that, my best guess is that when trouble comes knocking on the door, most of the good folks of Tejas (Texas) reach for their telephone to call the "Man" (police), before they reach for their hip (gun).

And from the grateful calls, cards and gifts we receive at the "plaintiff-oriented" law office I work at, it appears that many people's first instinct, when faced with a legal entanglement, is to "call my attorney". I'll also hazard to guess that the first response is about the same anywhere in the world where there are legal and law enforcement systems.

Advocacy

Ed Cantarella

While he waited I made the telephone call to his insurer to report the accident --- so he would have a claim number and claims adjuster's name to give to his doctors --- otherwise, no treatment.

"I've got bills and such Mr.Can-trell[sic], when will I get some money?"

"It could be 5, 6 weeks, maybe more."

"Damn! What am I supposed to do in between?!"

"We'll do what we can, I'm going to send out these forms today, along with some forms to your employer, to verify your pay. It's the best we can do under the circumstances."

"And you ain't gonna sell me out to that insurance company?"

"No sir, that's not how we make our living."

My first thought after letting him out is that I need to air out my suite and clean my desk and the vinyl upholstered chair where he had been sitting. "James" isn't knowledgeable in matters of personal hygiene either.

The color of money

"What about Dr.'R' that I gave you the referral to?"

"Aw man, that was too far."

"But I gave you the bus schedule! It would have taken you from your street and dropped you off in front of his building. $1.25 round trip."

"I hate riding the bus."

Trying a different tact to get to the heart of the matter, I ask " So what did Dr.'F' do?"

"Well I waited a long time, and then he like poked at my arm a little, did an x-ray, and re-wrapped my hand and wrist."

"Look James, there's a reason I didn't refer you to Dr. 'F.' See, some people don't seem to get very good treatment at Dr.'F's office."

"What you mean?"

"I mean that some people, particularly minorities, don't seem to get sent for any testing or referred to another specialist or any of the things that will make their case come together at Dr.'F's office.

"They've told me about the long waits and the in-and-out checkups Dr.'F' and his associates perform.

"Think about it, man, how long did they have you wait? And how many people went in and out of that office while you were there?"

"So you think they're prejudiced?"

Ever vigilant of potential slander areas, I hedge again. "I don't know, I'm just saying that some people seem to get better treatment at other offices than at Dr. 'F's, and we have our opinions about where some people will get the best treatment. Which will work out better for both of us."

Complaining, but (hopefully) convinced to follow my advice, James agrees to call Dr.'R' for an appointment.

Since I had "cracked the door" on the subject, he asks before I let him go,"You white boys ain't gonna sell me out to that insurance company, are you?"

I give him my stock answer with a personalized twist: "Didn't your friend say we took good care of her? We represent everyone the same. The only color that matters to us is green."

To Serve and Protect

Born in Australia, of Macedonian immigrants, my spouse came to the United States at 5 years of age. Not knowing the English language, the sight of police officers was always a comforting sight for her. Like many children, she had been taught to look for a police officer if she was lost, hurt or something terrible was happening. Today, my spouse has a master's degree in criminal justice, and works as a corrections officer at our county jail. She also has received dozens of letters, cards and even flowers from relatives of inmates who appreciated the fact that she didn't just treat them (or their relative/child/spouse) as another number..

Due to my spouse's job (and mine), I've had to rub shoulders with thousands of police officers. Some ARE the stereotyped "hard-asses" that would, IMHO, constitute the bulk of the "crooked cops". Others, seem like genuinely nice people. Just ordinary folks with families, kids, hobbies; people who want the law to be upheld so that ALL of us can enjoy some safety, security and consistency in life. Unfortunately, these "nice guy" cops, not the "hard-asses," are the ones who seem to get killed in the line of duty.

Dishonest attorneys, crooked cops; sorry folks, the prevalence of these in the real world is statistically low. It's like the character, "Shooter", played by actor Michael Douglas in the movie "Basic Instinct". At one point in the movie someone mentions that the average cop never shoots anyone in his career, but "Shooter" has managed to shoot and kill 4 "suspects" (innocent until proven guilty) in just a couple of years.

The average attorney is never disbarred or reprimanded by their state or local bar association during their career; however, a few attorneys manage to be reprimanded on several occasions, and finally disbarred from practicing law again, early in their careers.

As a pop tune from the early 70's explained,"One bad apple don't make the whole bunch..."

Most cops and attorneys are Serving, Protecting and Advocating on OUR behalf - we just don't like being caught up in their job. Considering the persistent nature of their work, it's not surprising that the public loves to hate cops and attorneys.

But let me ask you, when Trouble comes knocking on your door - Who ya gonnah call?